And make them last.



Do you only do therapy with couples or do you see individuals as well?

I have been working with both individuals and couples for over 30 years. The principles are essentially the same -- to help people build better relationships by increasing their capacity for empathy toward others. For the individual, this can help you form better relationships that are more likely to last. 

Is it a problem that we fight a lot? 

All relationships have bumps. When two people come together, it's likely their different ways of seeing the world will cause friction. How a couple manages those conflicts can mean the difference between a successful relationship and one that falters. It's possible to learn new ways of viewing your partner -- through a more compassionate lens -- that will lead to improved communication, more understanding and a better relationship. That's what we'll work on together in your sessions.

But isn't it true that happy couples never fight?

No, it's exactly the opposite. Fighting can actually help a relationship, if you do it in a productive way. Holding angry feelings does more to disrupt a relationship than getting those feelings out in the open and working them through. We all need to feel seen and accepted, and expressing anger and having those feelings understood  can strengthen the bond between the two of you. And, it can be especially helpful to have an objective third person to help you navigate those difficult conversations.

What if my partner/spouse doesn't want to come to therapy?

Sometimes only one person in the relationship feels ready to see a therapist. I am happy to talk to the reluctant partner by phone to answer questions and address their reservations. In some cases, it might still be useful for the person who wants to start therapy to meet with me alone. Since I see the situation from an objective perspective, I can help you make small changes that may shift the relationship in a positive way. Then, at a later date the reluctant partner might be more interested in joining in. Call, and we can discuss your particular situation.

I've/We've never been in therapy. How do we get started?

While I'm happy to answer your questions about therapy on the phone, it is best to schedule an appointment, so you can see if meeting with me feels comfortable. An important element in working with a therapist is to feel that their style is right and works for you.